Inertia

Today, as I was completely zoned out during a meeting, I realized my largest challenge here. It is the extremes of my brain functioning. I'd say 80% of the time I am a total zombie. I can't understand what anyone is saying around me (and I stopped trying to understand) or I'm waiting for something because things are inevitably slow, and my brain just shuts off. I used to daydream or make lists in my head or funny little story lines but lately I've just…stopped, all together.

Then at other times I need to force my brain into turbo mode or as I like to call it - what my brain used to be like every day in America. I have to make do something quickly and effectively, usually something I am completely unqualified to do. Getting up enough energy and motivation to perform like that is difficult when you've been sitting in zombie state for the rest of the day/week/how long have I been here?