I was just reading the newest edition (almost just wrote that as addition - I've got the phonetics of English down but the spelling is slipping as more time passes) of SOMA. The volunteers have a chance to creatively express themselves through stories, poems, new recipes, funny cartoons, and share it with the rest of us in a show of camaraderie. These readings have sparked a few things in my mind, things I need to revisit from previous blog posts.
Awhile ago I wrote about routine. After moving to site my routine was the only thing I could conceivably control. I held onto it with an iron fist until water shortages and coworker visits crippled it, and my sanity at moments. As important as creating some normalcy was at that point in time, the true pinnacle is knowing when to let that go. As service continues, you don't have to rely on that so direly. In fact if you don't let it go and let it flow, then the routine becomes the downfall.
Also, quite a few months ago, I was lamenting that Peace Corps' weakness is expecting one individual to embody so many personality and professional traits. I saw the ultimate success of the program happening with small teams of volunteers, working together geographically and complementing each other. But I had not equated for a huge facet of Peace Corps, which I reminded of at my mid-service conference - the elusive replacement. Peace Corps is a team sport. You just never get to meet your team. The relationships, the reputation, the foundation I build in my community should not be expected to bear immediate fruit. And Peace Corps is very realistically aware of that. I am the second person in a large relay team. The baton I pass is all of that good will I built up and trust I sowed in my community. Maybe a project the next person starts will be followed up in a different capacity by the next one after that. After a group learns a trade, they need management skills, book keeping skills, marketing skills, a way to expand the business. More than that, they need time, fresh blood and new energy. They need the relay team.
Not every site will be replaced and that is the dirty work of the first few groups to return to Rwanda - to find those optimal sites and to nurture them. There will be a lot of wasted effort, a lot of hair pulling out moments aka frustration. But those are the real projects of the first few groups - to build for the future. We are like the first child with the amateur parents. It's time to suck it up and help out the "younger" siblings. Our value is in how great we can make their experience. So good luck next health group. I'm rooting for ya!
Thursday, March 31, 2011
Back to our normal programming
I'd say 90% of my days here are filled with asinine conversation. Let's remember I talk like a toddler in Kinyarwanda. Even though many people surrounding me speak English, our conversations usually revolve around silly jokes, food in front of us, weather and my inability to talk, cook or clean in this culture. It makes for some dry days. And then, just like that, the clouds clear and a rainstorm falls.
Sometimes I get in such a conversation rut that I forget I'm even in one. Then the wheels start turning and they HURT. If I'm remembering correctly there are many a day like this back at home too. It's amazing how many days we can waste talking about absolutely nothing. Well this one day in particular was NOT one of those days. So I'll tell you about it.
First of all, as soon as this invigorating conversation with two coworkers ended, I immediately wanted to phone a friend and spread the joy of enlightening debate. That tells you how dire the situation is sometimes. When was the last time you called someone to tell them about a great conversation you had with another person, not the subject matter, just the simple fact that this conversation occurred?
It all started with a discussion about the genocide memorials coming up. Yes, we have circled a complete year and are back to memorial time. I'm still conflicted about whether this is keeping people too focused on the past or is an excellent reminder to not repeat the past. I'm sure my opinion will always be in flux about this. I was discussing it with a new intern we have for the hospital. Noel is spending part of his time in the mental health office. He informed me that he would be traveling around the countryside to sensitize people. This is favorite term of health professionals here. He is trying to reduce the stigma towards mental illness (I didn't have very encouraging news for him on that front in America, sadly!), support real deal therapy (not just medication!) and educate about post traumatic stress disorder.
Noel seemed open enough, so even though it was my first time speaking with him, I asked his opinion on the memorial ceremonies. He believes it is an important tool for educating the future generations, to not repeat the mistakes of the past and to take time to recognize the trauma and tragedy of Rwandan history. However he also sees the peril of it. He's been very happy to see the changes that the Rwandan government have imposed, wary of secondary trauma. Let me back up a moment. Secondary trauma is when young Rwandans, who weren't alive during the genocide, are experiencing PTSD because of reliving the memories of relatives and community members. I've seen a lot of this. During the last memorial period we had many secondary students in crisis, having flashbacks, but they weren't experiencing their own flashbacks.
Usually during memorial ceremonies there are movies shown, testimonies given, songs performed, bonfires through the night with more stories shared, marches to memorial graveyards and sites. The government of Rwanda has banned some of the more violent movies and stressed that people should give testimonies, leaving out more grisly details. The message lives on but hopefully without making it so lifelike that young Rwandans carry the trauma with them. Noel seemed hopeful that this was a great improvement that had already been enacted. Policies always sound wonderful. That's not usually the problem with the Rwandan government.
From this topic we moved on to the changes in government scholarships. Turns out there has been a sudden shift, forcing many students to quit school. The government has stopped giving so many scholarships and loans. This wasn't a graduated change that would grandfather older students out of the old system. From their perspective, this change was cut and dry, black and white, the dropout rate soared. Banks here don't give out student loans. So we discussed the system and options in the US - the less glamourous view of loans, debt, unemployment and health insurance. They could make some sense of it if Rwanda wanted a smaller governmental role, if they are modeling other countries' systems. However the timeline would not be supported. How could you plan for that as a student? The stress on families to pick up the bill or the individual student with no alternative and payment plan is unrealistic.
Then, marathon style, we switched over to language - a favorite topic for any Rwandan it seems. They acknowledged that Rwanda is having a hard time fully embracing English. Unlike other African countries who have many regional languages, English isn't needed to unite them under one nationality. Rwanda has always had Kinyarwanda that the entire population spoke. The only argument for unification is helping it fall in line with the East African Community. My two coworkers both talked about getting mocked, and worse, for using english outside of the classroom. Peers accusing them of being uppity and not patriotic. It's a difficult path to follow. I threw in a point about American families who have a second language spoken only in their home.
We spoke a little bit about the fast changes being made in Rwanda. There is such a pride here, as there should be. This country is one of the very few bright spots of hope on this continent (in my opinion). It was my second time in a one month span of having a Rwanda tell me that if I come back to visit after my two year stint, I won't even recognize the village, or the capital. I wholeheartedly agree. Even just the year I've been here, there has been huge changes. I can't wait until my Dad comes to visit and I can point out all the progress from when I first arrived.
Then the conversation turned to health insurance and health facilities. Even thought the enrollment fee for health insurance here is very cheap, the patients still have to pay 10% of EVERYTHING. I'm talking down to how many pairs of gloves the nurses use while treating them. We lamented about people who want to risk it by thinking they won't need health insurance - that's a cross border issue. Somehow cancer came up. They didn't know stats but imagined that most people don't get diagnosed because they are too poor and have other health problems first. If a Rwandan is diagnosed with cancer, they are shipped to Kampala for treatment. Other treatments just beginning - transplants. Only kidney transplants are being done in Rwanda currently. The rest would need to be outside the country.
Two more twists before this marathon was over - profit v. nonprofit services and then churches…get excited.
It was once again a lazy afternoon in the hospital. Absolutely no patients for mental health. Only a couple waiting in general consolation and one for the dentist. Noel was loving it. However, medical imaging guy (don't remember his name. My name skills aren't getting any better. but yes, he does x-rays and operates our new ultrasound machine) wanted to play devil's advocate. Isn't having no patients bad for business, he queried. What if the Ministry of Health saw a lack of need for this hospital and closed it? or what if it realized that it wasn't properly serving this community since surely there are people out there in need of health services? We discussed the concept of hospitals as a business. Then got into a conversation about American nursing homes and the dangers of having for-profit health services. The concept of nursing homes is so very foreign here where family or community or sheer independence of the elderly don't jive with our system. I tried to emphasize how alone some people can be, with no one to help them or no one WILLING to help them. I'm not sure it's an easy notion to get across in this culture. It's like an overcrowded city but with the small town 'up in everyone's business' mentality.
And last but not least was religion. Turned out all three of us were Catholic (even if I'm more than half poser). There's always a pride that comes out when fellow Catholics realize you are Catholic - like I know how to do the secret handshake. Medical Imaging Guy (MIG) started making fun of all the new churches popping up. They are in the business of making money, sadly, similar to many churches around the world. He laughed about how you will hear loud Gospel music blasting from buildings with a new church sign. You will think it is packed with people fervently worshipping God. Instead you find the pastor, his wife and child as the only people inside. They are trying so desperately to put yet another church in this country. It's not that MIG and Noel didn't appreciate religion. They understood that faith and religion were the precious stepping stones that helped Rwandans drudge themselves away from a genocide. They weren't going to negate Christian principles. But it got back to for-profit v. non-profit outfits. Since when did church plausibly get categorized as for-profit? (Tangent involving a reference to Canterbury Tales and the greedy nature of certain religious leaders from the beginning of time that I won't bother you with.) But then a legitimate debate began over whether Catholicism should modernize. Con - isn't the whole point tradition, ceremony, consistency? Pro - attracting the next generation of Catholics with more modern instruments and music. I held center with one foot planted on each side. I explained about the church I went to at University. That Catholic churches can slowly and tentatively change to suit their constituents (isn't the church truly made out of people anyhow?). Out with the kneeling, out with the choir tucked into a balcony, out with the altar being distant from the people, too elevated for them to reach. In with new musical arrangements, free spaghetti dinners for hungry students, more volunteer trips, religious debates with the priest held at a pub. Young Catholics can still embrace tradition but that doesn't mean their lives inside and outside of church have to be alien to each other. Just because tradition is honored doesn't mean the tough faith questions should be glossed over because the details are harshly modern problems. I waffled quite well (any Madison readers out there?).
By this time, five o'clock had rolled around. No afternoon wasted this time.
Sometimes I get in such a conversation rut that I forget I'm even in one. Then the wheels start turning and they HURT. If I'm remembering correctly there are many a day like this back at home too. It's amazing how many days we can waste talking about absolutely nothing. Well this one day in particular was NOT one of those days. So I'll tell you about it.
First of all, as soon as this invigorating conversation with two coworkers ended, I immediately wanted to phone a friend and spread the joy of enlightening debate. That tells you how dire the situation is sometimes. When was the last time you called someone to tell them about a great conversation you had with another person, not the subject matter, just the simple fact that this conversation occurred?
It all started with a discussion about the genocide memorials coming up. Yes, we have circled a complete year and are back to memorial time. I'm still conflicted about whether this is keeping people too focused on the past or is an excellent reminder to not repeat the past. I'm sure my opinion will always be in flux about this. I was discussing it with a new intern we have for the hospital. Noel is spending part of his time in the mental health office. He informed me that he would be traveling around the countryside to sensitize people. This is favorite term of health professionals here. He is trying to reduce the stigma towards mental illness (I didn't have very encouraging news for him on that front in America, sadly!), support real deal therapy (not just medication!) and educate about post traumatic stress disorder.
Noel seemed open enough, so even though it was my first time speaking with him, I asked his opinion on the memorial ceremonies. He believes it is an important tool for educating the future generations, to not repeat the mistakes of the past and to take time to recognize the trauma and tragedy of Rwandan history. However he also sees the peril of it. He's been very happy to see the changes that the Rwandan government have imposed, wary of secondary trauma. Let me back up a moment. Secondary trauma is when young Rwandans, who weren't alive during the genocide, are experiencing PTSD because of reliving the memories of relatives and community members. I've seen a lot of this. During the last memorial period we had many secondary students in crisis, having flashbacks, but they weren't experiencing their own flashbacks.
Usually during memorial ceremonies there are movies shown, testimonies given, songs performed, bonfires through the night with more stories shared, marches to memorial graveyards and sites. The government of Rwanda has banned some of the more violent movies and stressed that people should give testimonies, leaving out more grisly details. The message lives on but hopefully without making it so lifelike that young Rwandans carry the trauma with them. Noel seemed hopeful that this was a great improvement that had already been enacted. Policies always sound wonderful. That's not usually the problem with the Rwandan government.
From this topic we moved on to the changes in government scholarships. Turns out there has been a sudden shift, forcing many students to quit school. The government has stopped giving so many scholarships and loans. This wasn't a graduated change that would grandfather older students out of the old system. From their perspective, this change was cut and dry, black and white, the dropout rate soared. Banks here don't give out student loans. So we discussed the system and options in the US - the less glamourous view of loans, debt, unemployment and health insurance. They could make some sense of it if Rwanda wanted a smaller governmental role, if they are modeling other countries' systems. However the timeline would not be supported. How could you plan for that as a student? The stress on families to pick up the bill or the individual student with no alternative and payment plan is unrealistic.
Then, marathon style, we switched over to language - a favorite topic for any Rwandan it seems. They acknowledged that Rwanda is having a hard time fully embracing English. Unlike other African countries who have many regional languages, English isn't needed to unite them under one nationality. Rwanda has always had Kinyarwanda that the entire population spoke. The only argument for unification is helping it fall in line with the East African Community. My two coworkers both talked about getting mocked, and worse, for using english outside of the classroom. Peers accusing them of being uppity and not patriotic. It's a difficult path to follow. I threw in a point about American families who have a second language spoken only in their home.
We spoke a little bit about the fast changes being made in Rwanda. There is such a pride here, as there should be. This country is one of the very few bright spots of hope on this continent (in my opinion). It was my second time in a one month span of having a Rwanda tell me that if I come back to visit after my two year stint, I won't even recognize the village, or the capital. I wholeheartedly agree. Even just the year I've been here, there has been huge changes. I can't wait until my Dad comes to visit and I can point out all the progress from when I first arrived.
Then the conversation turned to health insurance and health facilities. Even thought the enrollment fee for health insurance here is very cheap, the patients still have to pay 10% of EVERYTHING. I'm talking down to how many pairs of gloves the nurses use while treating them. We lamented about people who want to risk it by thinking they won't need health insurance - that's a cross border issue. Somehow cancer came up. They didn't know stats but imagined that most people don't get diagnosed because they are too poor and have other health problems first. If a Rwandan is diagnosed with cancer, they are shipped to Kampala for treatment. Other treatments just beginning - transplants. Only kidney transplants are being done in Rwanda currently. The rest would need to be outside the country.
Two more twists before this marathon was over - profit v. nonprofit services and then churches…get excited.
It was once again a lazy afternoon in the hospital. Absolutely no patients for mental health. Only a couple waiting in general consolation and one for the dentist. Noel was loving it. However, medical imaging guy (don't remember his name. My name skills aren't getting any better. but yes, he does x-rays and operates our new ultrasound machine) wanted to play devil's advocate. Isn't having no patients bad for business, he queried. What if the Ministry of Health saw a lack of need for this hospital and closed it? or what if it realized that it wasn't properly serving this community since surely there are people out there in need of health services? We discussed the concept of hospitals as a business. Then got into a conversation about American nursing homes and the dangers of having for-profit health services. The concept of nursing homes is so very foreign here where family or community or sheer independence of the elderly don't jive with our system. I tried to emphasize how alone some people can be, with no one to help them or no one WILLING to help them. I'm not sure it's an easy notion to get across in this culture. It's like an overcrowded city but with the small town 'up in everyone's business' mentality.
And last but not least was religion. Turned out all three of us were Catholic (even if I'm more than half poser). There's always a pride that comes out when fellow Catholics realize you are Catholic - like I know how to do the secret handshake. Medical Imaging Guy (MIG) started making fun of all the new churches popping up. They are in the business of making money, sadly, similar to many churches around the world. He laughed about how you will hear loud Gospel music blasting from buildings with a new church sign. You will think it is packed with people fervently worshipping God. Instead you find the pastor, his wife and child as the only people inside. They are trying so desperately to put yet another church in this country. It's not that MIG and Noel didn't appreciate religion. They understood that faith and religion were the precious stepping stones that helped Rwandans drudge themselves away from a genocide. They weren't going to negate Christian principles. But it got back to for-profit v. non-profit outfits. Since when did church plausibly get categorized as for-profit? (Tangent involving a reference to Canterbury Tales and the greedy nature of certain religious leaders from the beginning of time that I won't bother you with.) But then a legitimate debate began over whether Catholicism should modernize. Con - isn't the whole point tradition, ceremony, consistency? Pro - attracting the next generation of Catholics with more modern instruments and music. I held center with one foot planted on each side. I explained about the church I went to at University. That Catholic churches can slowly and tentatively change to suit their constituents (isn't the church truly made out of people anyhow?). Out with the kneeling, out with the choir tucked into a balcony, out with the altar being distant from the people, too elevated for them to reach. In with new musical arrangements, free spaghetti dinners for hungry students, more volunteer trips, religious debates with the priest held at a pub. Young Catholics can still embrace tradition but that doesn't mean their lives inside and outside of church have to be alien to each other. Just because tradition is honored doesn't mean the tough faith questions should be glossed over because the details are harshly modern problems. I waffled quite well (any Madison readers out there?).
By this time, five o'clock had rolled around. No afternoon wasted this time.
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
Blog Blog Blog
Seeing the shrunken arms or the bloated stomaches, the bruises from abuse or the scars from the past…that's not where the real pain is. The eyes…the eyes are haunting. There is so much hurt and pleading there. There is an instant link, human-to-human.
The other day one volunteer was talking about another one who has been in Rwanda for quite some time and still consistently writes on their blog. Volunteer #1 quipped, what is left to say? How sad. Shouldn't our commentary get better with time, instead of just being about first impressions, misconceptions and physical surroundings.
Every day is full of grappling to make sense of things. And when you think you figured out one puzzle piece there is another one rearing its head. Every set of eyes are slightly different, with their own unique story, their own clue into how this world spins round.
The more people I meet, the more stories I will have to tell. The more trusting people become and the more curious I become with my questions, the better I can give you all a glimpse into life here. I hope I'm still going strong a year from now. In the meantime, if you're wondering about something, it never hurts to ask and I'll try and get some answers from the Rwandans surrounding me.
PS. Happy St. Patty's Day.
The other day one volunteer was talking about another one who has been in Rwanda for quite some time and still consistently writes on their blog. Volunteer #1 quipped, what is left to say? How sad. Shouldn't our commentary get better with time, instead of just being about first impressions, misconceptions and physical surroundings.
Every day is full of grappling to make sense of things. And when you think you figured out one puzzle piece there is another one rearing its head. Every set of eyes are slightly different, with their own unique story, their own clue into how this world spins round.
The more people I meet, the more stories I will have to tell. The more trusting people become and the more curious I become with my questions, the better I can give you all a glimpse into life here. I hope I'm still going strong a year from now. In the meantime, if you're wondering about something, it never hurts to ask and I'll try and get some answers from the Rwandans surrounding me.
PS. Happy St. Patty's Day.
Adages
I've recently come across a few Rwandan adages that I thought particularly interesting coming from their history and culture.
~Pain pains but never pays.
~Sorry doesn't repair.
~Too much of everything is always bad.
They love their sayings here. They also recited a few I'd heard before - No man is an island type of stuff. Just one more thing to ponder when looking at a culture from the outside.
~Pain pains but never pays.
~Sorry doesn't repair.
~Too much of everything is always bad.
They love their sayings here. They also recited a few I'd heard before - No man is an island type of stuff. Just one more thing to ponder when looking at a culture from the outside.
Entitlement
One thing I've been realizing is how entitled I feel as an American. It's all about I deserve this for doing nothing, or I can't believe you are treating me like that.
The simplest, most non-controversial example I can come up with is snail mail. For the past three months, at least, mail from Rwanda to the US has been halted. Some rumors about terrorists and Yemen…not sure how all that goes together but that's what rumors are all about I suppose. Just in the last week they have started to allow mail again. Which is a relief to all those letter writing PCVs, and gift-shipping ones too. Snail mail is something we just take for granted. Imagine Georgia saying to Maine - I don't trust you so I'm not going to allow any mail to go from me to you. That sounds ludicrous, doesn't it?
The messier parts of entitlement include respect, having someone acknowledge your level of education or the fact that age doesn't reflect your maturity and experience. and yet what did I ever do to earn those things? It's almost as if patriotism has become a badge of self-righteousness and high maintenance living. Somehow the history of the US has given me permission to demand a pedestal.
After reflecting on what I just wrote, I realized it sounds like I don't believe in basic human rights or that everyone should respect everyone else. I do believe these things but I also think we should be cognizant of our behavior. We can't just demand these things without also giving them to others. We can't assume we earned something because of a birthright.
In a completely unrelated note: I am a full fledged addict to West Wing now and I was pondering the other day how interesting it would be if a political show like that were made in Rwanda…or India…or China…or Mexico. How different would it look? Would anyone in those countries want to watch it? Would it turn from a drama to a tragic comedy? How many women in powerful positions would be acceptable?
The simplest, most non-controversial example I can come up with is snail mail. For the past three months, at least, mail from Rwanda to the US has been halted. Some rumors about terrorists and Yemen…not sure how all that goes together but that's what rumors are all about I suppose. Just in the last week they have started to allow mail again. Which is a relief to all those letter writing PCVs, and gift-shipping ones too. Snail mail is something we just take for granted. Imagine Georgia saying to Maine - I don't trust you so I'm not going to allow any mail to go from me to you. That sounds ludicrous, doesn't it?
The messier parts of entitlement include respect, having someone acknowledge your level of education or the fact that age doesn't reflect your maturity and experience. and yet what did I ever do to earn those things? It's almost as if patriotism has become a badge of self-righteousness and high maintenance living. Somehow the history of the US has given me permission to demand a pedestal.
After reflecting on what I just wrote, I realized it sounds like I don't believe in basic human rights or that everyone should respect everyone else. I do believe these things but I also think we should be cognizant of our behavior. We can't just demand these things without also giving them to others. We can't assume we earned something because of a birthright.
In a completely unrelated note: I am a full fledged addict to West Wing now and I was pondering the other day how interesting it would be if a political show like that were made in Rwanda…or India…or China…or Mexico. How different would it look? Would anyone in those countries want to watch it? Would it turn from a drama to a tragic comedy? How many women in powerful positions would be acceptable?
Pretty Paper
Some fights are easy. There isn't a law, there needs to be a law. There needs to be recognition of a problem. There needs to be protection under some sort of authority. Some fights are more convoluted than that.
We had a great discussion during the HIV conference around gender based violence but like many things in Rwanda it left us with no clear solution. A lot of things on paper here look amazing. There are already laws in place to criminalize gender based violence. There are laws that give women (and men) the right to divorce an abusive spouse. The problem is implementation.
For example, it's awesome to have a law requiring all children to attend school until they reach a certain age. The problem comes in when you travel to the tiny, isolated village that does whatever it wants. The villagers decide to keep their daughters at home to do chores because they see educating girls as a waste of time.
A second example, a woman keeps getting beat by her husband. After talking to authorities many times, she is stuck. She technically has the right under the law to divorce her husband but the local authorities (many, many layers of bureaucracy) refuse to allow it. She eventually gets her leg cut off with a machete by her husband. Now even if she was granted a divorce, she would have no way to support her and her children.
The follow up is the real fight. The sticky business of changing behavior and perceptions. We got into an especially riveting debate about whether empowering women wouldn't just immediately make society biased against men. If only they saw the decades of slow progress that needs to happen before we can even entertain that idea. (You can start debating affirmative action at this point but I don't have it in me.)
We had a great discussion during the HIV conference around gender based violence but like many things in Rwanda it left us with no clear solution. A lot of things on paper here look amazing. There are already laws in place to criminalize gender based violence. There are laws that give women (and men) the right to divorce an abusive spouse. The problem is implementation.
For example, it's awesome to have a law requiring all children to attend school until they reach a certain age. The problem comes in when you travel to the tiny, isolated village that does whatever it wants. The villagers decide to keep their daughters at home to do chores because they see educating girls as a waste of time.
A second example, a woman keeps getting beat by her husband. After talking to authorities many times, she is stuck. She technically has the right under the law to divorce her husband but the local authorities (many, many layers of bureaucracy) refuse to allow it. She eventually gets her leg cut off with a machete by her husband. Now even if she was granted a divorce, she would have no way to support her and her children.
The follow up is the real fight. The sticky business of changing behavior and perceptions. We got into an especially riveting debate about whether empowering women wouldn't just immediately make society biased against men. If only they saw the decades of slow progress that needs to happen before we can even entertain that idea. (You can start debating affirmative action at this point but I don't have it in me.)
Pretty Paper
Some fights are easy. There isn't a law, there needs to be a law. There needs to be recognition of a problem. There needs to be protection under some sort of authority. Some fights are more convoluted than that.
We had a great discussion during the HIV conference around gender based violence but like many things in Rwanda it left us with no clear solution. A lot of things on paper here look amazing. There are already laws in place to criminalize gender based violence. There are laws that give women (and men) the right to divorce an abusive spouse. The problem is implementation.
For example, it's awesome to have a law requiring all children to attend school until they reach a certain age. The problem comes in when you travel to the tiny, isolated village that does whatever it wants. The villagers decide to keep their daughters at home to do chores because they see educating girls as a waste of time.
A second example, a woman keeps getting beat by her husband. After talking to authorities many times, she is stuck. She technically has the right under the law to divorce her husband but the local authorities (many, many layers of bureaucracy) refuse to allow it. She eventually gets her leg cut off with a machete by her husband. Now even if she was granted a divorce, she would have no way to support her and her children.
The follow up is the real fight. The sticky business of changing behavior and perceptions. We got into an especially riveting debate about whether empowering women wouldn't just immediately make society biased against men. If only they saw the decades of slow progress that needs to happen before we can even entertain that idea. (You can start debating affirmative action at this point but I don't have it in me.)
We had a great discussion during the HIV conference around gender based violence but like many things in Rwanda it left us with no clear solution. A lot of things on paper here look amazing. There are already laws in place to criminalize gender based violence. There are laws that give women (and men) the right to divorce an abusive spouse. The problem is implementation.
For example, it's awesome to have a law requiring all children to attend school until they reach a certain age. The problem comes in when you travel to the tiny, isolated village that does whatever it wants. The villagers decide to keep their daughters at home to do chores because they see educating girls as a waste of time.
A second example, a woman keeps getting beat by her husband. After talking to authorities many times, she is stuck. She technically has the right under the law to divorce her husband but the local authorities (many, many layers of bureaucracy) refuse to allow it. She eventually gets her leg cut off with a machete by her husband. Now even if she was granted a divorce, she would have no way to support her and her children.
The follow up is the real fight. The sticky business of changing behavior and perceptions. We got into an especially riveting debate about whether empowering women wouldn't just immediately make society biased against men. If only they saw the decades of slow progress that needs to happen before we can even entertain that idea. (You can start debating affirmative action at this point but I don't have it in me.)
Midway
Hello again.
I just returned from my mid-service conference coupled with an HIV conference compliments of PEPFAR. It was a great time to see old faces, catch up, vent, refocus, enjoy each other's company, and then brainstorm HIV prevention, gender based violence, and incoming generating projects. As you may have assumed, mid-service is meant to be a year into service (really a year from swear in - which for me was the beginning of May, but we're a little early). It's a celebration of sorts. We even started talking about the close of service conference. It's like when you're a freshman in high school and they start talking about graduation. The ever elusive light at the end of the tunnel.
As at any great conference, at least one good prank needs to be pulled. These aren't elaborate due to our lack of prep time and supplies available. Previous pranks have ranged from trying to tie someone into their room using bed sheets(unsuccessful) to piling outdoor furniture in a mountain so they couldn't enter their room (we helped them get in but enjoyed a good laugh first). Of course I have a co-conspirator role in some of these. But this conference we had mellowed out, so there was nothing elaborate or taking too much time away from hanging out, playing games. In an act of ultimate vengeance, a plank was played on Kelly, the ringleader of all things sneaky. Kelly had accidentally left her key unprotected during a game of Mafia. A fake phone called created an escape from the crowd and then her room was tp-ed. We all scampered over to hear her reaction at the end of the night. Like any great warrior in the art of pranking she was impressed and awed instead of mad. We also all decided that tp-ing things in Rwanda is waste of a precious resource and that she should try to roll it all back up for proper use. Only in Rwanda.
I have also just suffered through an incredibly harrowing bus ride. You see, the conference was being held out west, forcing the majority of us to ride through the forest to arrive. (The forest is Nyungwe Forest, beautiful and home to gorillas, baboons, etc.) The ride back was miserable. The motion sickness pills had no effect so use your imagination, times it by three and you'll come to the correct conclusion.
I am sitting here with Jessica (another volunteer), decompressing after a long week. In classic Rwandan style, we are distracted by the most disturbing animal noises. Ever since coming here it has been a battle to realize which sounds were made by small children and which were goats. This particular noise was more like a goat giving birth or a human in some serious distress. After allowing it to use up about 5 minutes of our attention, we went on with life.
I have come out of this conference with some semblance of rejuvenation. While its difficult to be in such a large group at times after being alone for so long and being required to sit and listen for so many hours in one day, I remembered once again how to be one of many and be a student.
I hope this feelings survives my reemergence in the village.
I just returned from my mid-service conference coupled with an HIV conference compliments of PEPFAR. It was a great time to see old faces, catch up, vent, refocus, enjoy each other's company, and then brainstorm HIV prevention, gender based violence, and incoming generating projects. As you may have assumed, mid-service is meant to be a year into service (really a year from swear in - which for me was the beginning of May, but we're a little early). It's a celebration of sorts. We even started talking about the close of service conference. It's like when you're a freshman in high school and they start talking about graduation. The ever elusive light at the end of the tunnel.
As at any great conference, at least one good prank needs to be pulled. These aren't elaborate due to our lack of prep time and supplies available. Previous pranks have ranged from trying to tie someone into their room using bed sheets(unsuccessful) to piling outdoor furniture in a mountain so they couldn't enter their room (we helped them get in but enjoyed a good laugh first). Of course I have a co-conspirator role in some of these. But this conference we had mellowed out, so there was nothing elaborate or taking too much time away from hanging out, playing games. In an act of ultimate vengeance, a plank was played on Kelly, the ringleader of all things sneaky. Kelly had accidentally left her key unprotected during a game of Mafia. A fake phone called created an escape from the crowd and then her room was tp-ed. We all scampered over to hear her reaction at the end of the night. Like any great warrior in the art of pranking she was impressed and awed instead of mad. We also all decided that tp-ing things in Rwanda is waste of a precious resource and that she should try to roll it all back up for proper use. Only in Rwanda.
I have also just suffered through an incredibly harrowing bus ride. You see, the conference was being held out west, forcing the majority of us to ride through the forest to arrive. (The forest is Nyungwe Forest, beautiful and home to gorillas, baboons, etc.) The ride back was miserable. The motion sickness pills had no effect so use your imagination, times it by three and you'll come to the correct conclusion.
I am sitting here with Jessica (another volunteer), decompressing after a long week. In classic Rwandan style, we are distracted by the most disturbing animal noises. Ever since coming here it has been a battle to realize which sounds were made by small children and which were goats. This particular noise was more like a goat giving birth or a human in some serious distress. After allowing it to use up about 5 minutes of our attention, we went on with life.
I have come out of this conference with some semblance of rejuvenation. While its difficult to be in such a large group at times after being alone for so long and being required to sit and listen for so many hours in one day, I remembered once again how to be one of many and be a student.
I hope this feelings survives my reemergence in the village.
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